unconditional or something like it...

we live in a world where waiting is inevitable... it's a game we play with each other... some of us are better at it than others but we all play it... either it's us who wait... or somebody else sits and foolishly awaits our arrival...

my friends hate me for being a perennial tardee in almost all meet-ups... business or social... sometimes, the longevity of waiting ends with nothing at all... i am guilty... i make them wait and yet, no me appears...

now, my closest friends know better than to arrive on time... naturally, 6pm would mean 8pm... 10pm would mean past midnight... lunch evidently turns out to be merienda... jumping-off at the break of dawn practically results to pulling-out during rush hour...

thank god... my friends love me this much to be patient with and endure even my worst liability... disrespect for their time... nobody leaves until i've sent text message that prue is on the way... they've learned not to make fools of themselves...

i feel that the last few years of my life i have become very entwined with the waiting game... but i play the culprit... the protagonist... the villain... the selfish, inconsiderate bad guy...

so now... karma finds me... it's my turn to wait...

i have actually prepared myself for it but i guess it's true, i can never be too prepared... there's a possibility that months extend to a year... or little less than it... but still, when you are just with yourself, days seem longer... a minute can seem to be an hour...

so, that's how it feels with my friends... mas mahaba ang oras kapag ikaw ang naghihintay... now, i am threatened to suffer much much worst... christmas may happen in summer...

he says he's not sure... that it maybe best if he saves the 85K he's suppose to pay for the plane fare... i see the wisdom in that, really i do... but i am just human... i've a heart that misses... i have memories to remind me of why i want him... besides, i've been won over...

even answers now have to wait... 10 days after all soul's, a choice has to be made... will a promise be fulfilled or must wisdom rule over emotion... be practical than emotional...

what is it i want to learn in this relationship? oh yeah... unconditional love... or something like it...